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Dear Forgotten Victims,
This may seem like an odd letter as I've never been involved in an accident that ended in any serious harm or loss of life to another. I just wanted to say that I am very pleased that there is such an organization as yours. When I pray The Rosary, I pray for the souls of my relatives who have died in vehicular accidents as well as anyone who has died in such manner.
I pray for God's healing mercy to be with the family, friends, and loved ones of those killed, and I also pray for those who have caused the accident whether through negligence, no fault, or with intent (they need our prayers most). It was thus something of a prayer answered to see that an organization such as yours has been formed; God's good works are done through his people.
Today would have been the 25th anniversary of my marriage to my beloved husband Jack, who died of a heart attack almost 10 years ago. Reading today's article about your organization was something of a connection to not only mine, but to all of our struggles here, and helped to give continued meaning to my life.
I pray your organization gathers strength and talent and becomes a much needed balm to many hurting souls. You've also reminded me to pray a little more for those who didn't die but were seriously injured.
Thank you and God bless.
-Betty Z
Dear Karen,
I read the recent article in the Union Tribune about the nonprofit agency which you have started to help people who have accidentally caused serious injury or death to others. I was very touched by the article and by what you are trying to do. Many years ago I was involved in a situation that resulted in the death of someone--it was not an automobile accident, but I felt so guilty about what happened that I abandoned my career and spent many years in therapy trying to deal with the situation.
This may sound odd, but I am writing to offer my support to you in what you are doing. A few years ago I went back to school and got my M.A. in psychology. After that I worked for 2 years at a hospice as a grief counselor. I am currently not working but am trying to start my own small private practice, doing dreamwork and counseling with people. I would love to talk with you about possibly volunteering some time to your organization to do grief counseling with your clients. If you are interested, please give me a call. -Kareen N
Hi Karen,
I was moved to tears by your story. I am one of those "unforgettable" victims of a serious car accident. (the kind people run to and recognize as injured, I am a paraplegic). It has led me to establishing the company you see listed below. My accident was 22 years ago. I think what you are doing is amazing and vital. I have thought about the driver (my friend, age 18) over the years. I have thought about "closure". I really support what you are doing. I think it will touch many lives in a positive enduring way.
As a person new to business ownership, I also marvel at your skills as a business person. I gleened from the article that you have a true vision for the direction of your non-profit and its potential. I would like to know more about becoming involved. Possibly exploring any tie-ins to what it is I offer at 24hourhomecare. But, mainly on a personal level, I am drawn to your strength, depth and personal triumphs. You were able to grasp what so many "non-victimized" individuals fail to get and that is: this event was a turning-point in your life--not an end point. Now, Forgotten Victims, will carry that perspective out into the population and create a safe place to process pain.
You were able to "make lemonade" which to most is just a cliche, but to those of us who have experienced "life-altering events" it means much more. The wisdom comes from the clarity of the permanent nature of "accidents". It is a powerful moment when you see how vulnerable each of is to life's quirky whims. The healing comes from within ourselves and from being within reach of others who share the "status" of whatever form our turning-point took,which is exactly the reason why you will experience great success with your new found (hard won) direction in life. It was all worth it! -Sherril A
Ms. Conde:
I am a native San Diegan, living in Seattle. I read the U-T article regarding your ordeal, your agency, and your eventual clearing and closure session with Ms. Buonopane. I am extremely pleased for both of you, that you were able to meet and understand the depths of emotion that will forever run through each of you. I will pray for each of you, and your continued efforts to individually heal. Additionally, I will pray for your organization, with the hope that unfortunate, suffering, individuals will recognize that there is a caring individual and agency available to assist them. God bless you, your family, Ms. Buonopane, her family, and anyone who needs your assistance. The world needs more like you. -Joseph S
I am so glad to have found you. I was just reading about Steve Vaught and stumbled upon information about you and your organization. Although my accident was back in Jan.1985 I began to cry today when I read what you wrote. I am shaking writing to you now. I said I wanted to do exactly what you have done. In all the years since my accident I have not been able to find any support from anyone who had a similar experience. I felt that it would be healing for me but also that I have alot to offer in the way of support to others. This past Jan I began to actively search for a group and when I couldn't find one I contacted a therapist who offered to start a group with me. She advertised it. We did not get any response. I know there are ALOT of people out there who need this kind of support. I guess I should tell you about my accident....it happened New Years' Day 1985. I had not been drinking and was not driving fast. I came around a bend in the road and a man was crossing against the light and I hit him. He died. In that moment my life changed and has never been the same. I have done many different things to heal, including therapy, workshops, groups, and even a 10 day silent meditation retreat...but none of it can compare to meeting someone who has had the expeience. I have often said that I believe there is a group out there for EVERYTHING... except this. I searched the internet back in Jan and couldn't find anything. By the way my name is Linda Weinstein, I am 49 and live in Philadelphia Pa. I don't know what to do or say next... I am still in shock that I have found you and your group after looking for so long. Your web site said it is under construction. Do you have an on line support group? Have you had a response? I am already thinking I should be planning a trip to California this summer. Please write back or call. -Linda W
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